Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
rose, bud, thorn,
(dad dinners - family time
mom dinners - family time
el matador - salty sea that made me cry)
a deep welt of grateness
smart mom takes charge of puzzling together moving truck and 1000 pieces of furniture
a furnished apt
3 hrs of sleep
work tour for parents (v. impressed)
bannana w suzzy
2 exams in 2 two hrs
upcoming house warming party
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
$3 ceramic tupperware, french blue
glad the sun is warming down, time to put on the sweater and v. thick socks. brewing rice for breakfast and dinner. going home tomorrow lunch. home sweet home- mom, dad, brother (w his first tattoo), and aunt i haven't seen in 7 yrs.
my current state is weathered. as usual, trying to figure out how to best manage my time. i spend any free time at the new apt. i love love love it. negative scanner is amazing, and i'm so excited to see more newly developed work when i get my negatives back. i certainly don't have the same kind of time i did in philly to put into photo outreach, but i also wasn't taking classes and etc. my days are v. full. it gives me such a powerful sense of autonomy, but look at me, i am so tired.
i want to lay next to a warm body, my almost black hair bun nestled in yr neck, and my ear to your chest. yes, slow kisses on the the eyelids of the sea.
glad the sun is warming down, time to put on the sweater and v. thick socks. brewing rice for breakfast and dinner. going home tomorrow lunch. home sweet home- mom, dad, brother (w his first tattoo), and aunt i haven't seen in 7 yrs.
my current state is weathered. as usual, trying to figure out how to best manage my time. i spend any free time at the new apt. i love love love it. negative scanner is amazing, and i'm so excited to see more newly developed work when i get my negatives back. i certainly don't have the same kind of time i did in philly to put into photo outreach, but i also wasn't taking classes and etc. my days are v. full. it gives me such a powerful sense of autonomy, but look at me, i am so tired.
i want to lay next to a warm body, my almost black hair bun nestled in yr neck, and my ear to your chest. yes, slow kisses on the the eyelids of the sea.
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
last night, a lemon in my backyard with elephantitus fell off of its stem, and already it is moldy.
as certain as our beginning, there is an end.
my backyard has been my savior. many hours already of letting the sun clear out the day's stress. oh its unbelievable that i feel such peace upon arrival in this new home. its so quiet and bright, and the weather has been v. good to us.
slowly setting up my new scanner. bright days keep me away from working inside. i read outside. i love reading poetry outside on our baby blue stair case.
i read ted berrigan's III from sonnets the other night, and i almost cried, he stirred me up so good:
Stronger than alcohol, more great than song,
deep in whose reeds great elephants decay;
I, an island, sail, and my shores toss
on a fragrant evening, fraught with sadness
bristling hate.
It's true, I weep too much. Dawns break
slow kisses on the eyelids of the sea,
what other men sometimes have thought they've seen.
And since then I've been bathing in the poem
lifting her shadowy flowers up for me,
and hurled by hurricanes to a birdless place
the waving flags, nor pass by prison ships
O let me burst, and I be lost at sea!
and fall on my knees then, womanly.
as certain as our beginning, there is an end.
my backyard has been my savior. many hours already of letting the sun clear out the day's stress. oh its unbelievable that i feel such peace upon arrival in this new home. its so quiet and bright, and the weather has been v. good to us.
slowly setting up my new scanner. bright days keep me away from working inside. i read outside. i love reading poetry outside on our baby blue stair case.
i read ted berrigan's III from sonnets the other night, and i almost cried, he stirred me up so good:
Stronger than alcohol, more great than song,
deep in whose reeds great elephants decay;
I, an island, sail, and my shores toss
on a fragrant evening, fraught with sadness
bristling hate.
It's true, I weep too much. Dawns break
slow kisses on the eyelids of the sea,
what other men sometimes have thought they've seen.
And since then I've been bathing in the poem
lifting her shadowy flowers up for me,
and hurled by hurricanes to a birdless place
the waving flags, nor pass by prison ships
O let me burst, and I be lost at sea!
and fall on my knees then, womanly.
Saturday, March 13, 2010
7 something hour hike today at the carson ridges behind fairfax. i like fairfax. awesome waterfalls, and 6 different plant habitats within 10 miles. really amazing to walk from low ground cover to redwood to tropics to etc.
photographed serpentine soil, conifers, and orange trees. we found a giant moth larva in a stream. the vultures were too fast to photograph, but they were totally waiting for us to die. they circled around us for hours. im actually starting to understand taxonomy and it makes me feel really good. i can tell you about the mustard family easily.
hound's tongue.
ice cream, kettle chips, and sparkling water for dinner. am so tired.
p.s. apt is so great
photographed serpentine soil, conifers, and orange trees. we found a giant moth larva in a stream. the vultures were too fast to photograph, but they were totally waiting for us to die. they circled around us for hours. im actually starting to understand taxonomy and it makes me feel really good. i can tell you about the mustard family easily.
hound's tongue.
ice cream, kettle chips, and sparkling water for dinner. am so tired.
p.s. apt is so great
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
i am pretty sleepy, but in a good mood. i'm going home soon, and it'll be so nice to see my family and friends. my aunt is in from thailand. haven't seen her in 7 years!!
im going to ride my bike and take pictures. go to home depot to buy paint for the apt. ikea for a bed frame.
$$$
am inspired by the latest wipnyc photographer, elin berge, who makes stunning work from feeling these relationships between thais and swedes. i miss home.
im going to ride my bike and take pictures. go to home depot to buy paint for the apt. ikea for a bed frame.
$$$
am inspired by the latest wipnyc photographer, elin berge, who makes stunning work from feeling these relationships between thais and swedes. i miss home.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
my epson v700! waiting to move into new apt before i assemble!
tripped to point reyes today, tomales bay, and kehoe beach. we saw san quentin on the way, and stopped at a great bakery. tim said him and his college friends clammed near by with tabasco in back pocket. i've got to do that! we identified nearly 100 different species (native and non-native) today. so glad i am home now though.
sand dunes and beach- it was so neat to see what most of the landscape looked like before much of the urban development in the 1800's. today there is a remarkable distinction between the habitats that encounter the strong winds. the amazing straight divide: vibrant shrubs and ground covers on one side (no wind), and sand on the other (wind).
i always feel good if i took plenty of pictures to be excited about.
tim told me about a wild animal refuge in watsonville, ca. the sector he volunteers for handles salamanders, but there is a hill he thinks i'll enjoy to photograph very much. we've made plans for me to come volunteer too! many wildly decomposing animals. i imagine a slope of old and new bones, scavenged and disarticulated with visual pleasure.
i went to santa cruz yesterday with sister to see brother. i really feel that living here is a good decision. so many good resources and family family family. returning to l.a. soon!
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
lay me down
what kind of life to lead? is what i'm thinking when i come home.
kae, my sister's roommate told me that this year is my year. she said it'll be bomb or she said it'll be pivotal. jasmine, my chinese fortuneteller, also said good things will come this year and to expect an auspicious 2011. wait, can you believe its march?!
i know i would feel at ease if i was in chinatown right now. tea, dumplings, etc. cheap things. gracefully stern mouths across the streets of chinese people. is that my half future because i am half chinese? i want smile-wrinkles though, but i'm already in a bad mood. i'm basically walking backwards from ever achieving smile-wrinkles.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sooo tired right now that it effects my ability to believe that good things are coming. except zach and i found an apt together! haven't signed the lease, but when i do i'll give out my new address to fellow friends.
a wise girl at work told me that i needed to be an advocate for myself. she is so right. im going to do this starting right now by doing some yoga. and then im going to bike over to the botanical nursery and surround myself with plants. Estelle holiday begins.
kae, my sister's roommate told me that this year is my year. she said it'll be bomb or she said it'll be pivotal. jasmine, my chinese fortuneteller, also said good things will come this year and to expect an auspicious 2011. wait, can you believe its march?!
i know i would feel at ease if i was in chinatown right now. tea, dumplings, etc. cheap things. gracefully stern mouths across the streets of chinese people. is that my half future because i am half chinese? i want smile-wrinkles though, but i'm already in a bad mood. i'm basically walking backwards from ever achieving smile-wrinkles.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sooo tired right now that it effects my ability to believe that good things are coming. except zach and i found an apt together! haven't signed the lease, but when i do i'll give out my new address to fellow friends.
a wise girl at work told me that i needed to be an advocate for myself. she is so right. im going to do this starting right now by doing some yoga. and then im going to bike over to the botanical nursery and surround myself with plants. Estelle holiday begins.
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