training fruit trees! can't wait to get a potted fruit tree. i'm in the midst of deciding what variety!



went to a back-to-back james bennings screening last night of american dreams: lost and found and landscape suicides. the latter was pretty good, although my judgement is uncertain because i still fell asleep. the other one was beyond disappointing.

megan said my 4x5's came out blank. i hope it is because i used uncertain old color film. it means i'll have to do all sorts of test, but my light meter is missing????! i am hoping i just left it behind at home. luckily, super star sis has a nice one i can borrow.

chinese new yr parade today. my nose is inflamed. i feel tired from attempting to be well-rested. spirits are just okay.

!!!!!!!! see you in 4 days epson v700!!!!

thick warm toast w butter and honey on rainy day

and i received two great letters this week.

one from annie thornton who shared the symbol of the chapman family with me via letterhead and waxed seal of an anchor

another great from emma young- an office envelop enclosed with many letters, new poems, and a great photo of us in maine (we look so young and tender)

sisters of the heart

a world class situation

its strange how the loss of confidence slides in- a fox in a hole! and so it goes, i would rather only know what i experience.

i am so grateful to have witnessed nathaniel dorsky's new films and to hear him speak about what it means to be devoted, to be an artist. his work was beyond beautiful and it was especially important to be reminded about the significance of understanding your own practice. he included insight on his faith and understanding of cinema.

some of his decisions are based on the gratifying sense of surprise, how it moves him, how it touches him because he thinks cinema is about touching not thinking. and how important it is breathe, how film is more like painting than it is photography. the emulsion is moving!

"stay in place, the world will recognize you if you don't move to serve them"

my soul is in total agreement with his spirit.

hello negative scanner

its considered equity now

fantasy leaves

class was good today- leaf shapes, leaf bases and tips, leaf margins, leaf textures and leaf modifications. take home exam and an in-person practical (test). i like that he avoids using slides and always comes in with amazing plants. god, tilanzias are so beautiful. i will picture one:



we get to do plant family projects! i am hoping i get my first choice of the gramineae family- the grass family!

i'm excited for marin this weekend. im going to visit a friend of a friend's farm. i wonder what other nice things there are to do up there? i want to take a the ferry there some day with my bicycle.

i discovered someone with a negative scanner at my work. he also has a black and white and color darkroom!! there are a couple noteworthy photo facilities in sf, but they range from pricey to competitive. there is also someone at work who sails!! he says he'll take me when the weather turns around. i love that there are too many things to do.

tomorrow night, zach and i are going to see a showcase of nathaniel dorsky films. he'll be there in person for interviews etc. i love him even though i haven't seen a thing by him. he is a great thinker, a great writer. you must read devotional cinema. it's my favorite book. sarah said she saw him walking around the park with his 16mm under his coat trying to look casual.

IA RICHARDS

"Words are the meeting points at which regions of experience which can never combine in sensation or intuition come together. They are the occasion and the means of that growth which is the mind's endless endeavour to order itself. That is why we have language. It is no mere signalling system. It is the instrument of all our distinctively human development, of everything in which we go beyond the other animals."

devil in a blue dress

i am not getting the basics done (laundry, eating, sleeping).

yesterday was my first me day in a long time. i worked on my rug project and then i read. then i ran 3 or something miles along the peninsula near emeryville. so beautiful. that was my favorite part of the day because i breathed in so much sea salt and i ran next to the sunset. salt has a specific punch that i love. it gets me right in the lungs.

looked at apts today. hopeful to say the least! we'll see about tomorrow though. more apartments.

i like the idea of partying, but i like the idea of taking it easy more. i can't see my future right now.

yesterday we took the ferry from oakland to sf. it was an industrial scene, but i really love all the emergency orange submarines on the freight boats. the boat went under the bay bridge, which is a sight i've never imagined seeing. we got off at the ferry building and said hello to cathleen, a woman who owns an antique kitchenware store (18th century french linens!) called culinaire. we cruised establishments of excellence - cowgirl creamery, boulette's larder, recchuiti confectionary, and others.

we walked from there to chinatown for tea tastings. 3 hours of everything-oolongs, relationship advice, immigrant jokes, and amazingness. they thought we were married. i flashed my diamond ring as an engagement ring. teas to remember:

-iron goddess, the rare kind that grown in 5,000 ft elevation. it is picked once a year amounting to 20 lbs for an entire season to be shared by the world- $800/lb. they only carry a quarter of a lb.
-golden throat
-blue people
-blueberry
-drunken eight
-monkey fit

steamed pork dumplings for dinner & seasonal chinese peas.

then met up with zach for a big sleepy hang out. lots of credence clearwater covering soul songs.

6 hr san bruno mountain hike today with field taxonomy class! what a strange bunch of people, but all very nice. started with showers ended with rainbows. derek from work came as my guest. we lounged hard afterwards.

our teacher, glenn keator, wrote this awesome book:


washed chef coat by hand and drying with hair blower.