saturday morning reflections

there are just things in the world that you keep returning to. if you feel lost, in the all of the multitude of ways that is possible, there are things that keep you grounded, certain things that you remember or keep close as way to navigate back to yourself. time and time again, this (b)log and what it contains proves to serve that purpose for me. writing in general is a relief, but only because it helps solidify the process of experience - it's so important to know what you are thinking - it can skirt by so easily, for me at least, that writing is an effective way of staying aware. lately, i've been so caught up in the workings of the ngo office that i've forgotten about my personal tenor. it never disappeared, but i forgot to listen.

the service, the role of this ngo is important. i believe in and with what they are doing. however, i often forget that amongst the rest of my coworkers, i am a different breed. i wasn't trained to be a marketer, a scientist, sociologist or forester or a lawyer. the skills that i have developed (among others) is based in visual thinking or visual communication with a particular stress in poetry, by which i mean using language for it's broadest spectrum of meanings. it's a different kind of observation, that presents different kinds of questions and resolves problems that you present from your observations differently. in one sense, working with these other professionals, i am bettering those other skills/habits required to be a scientist, forester, writer, or sociologist (actually, a few of them, like the latter, i am inspired by), but i remain a visual thinker. by no means am i the best, or a very strong visual thinker, but this is what i am passionate about and this is what i have been practicing since the age of 17. "... the artist or craftsman in any field differs thus from those who lack his skill. He has a habit they lack. (Mortimer Adler)" Above everything else, visual thinking is my habit.

there are many different titles and backgrounds at work, and with the lack of synergy at the office, this means that people don't really understand where you come from, actually, where anyone is coming from. i have a similar experience outside of work which is another way of saying that i miss my community of friends who i can share my experiences and interests with. some of my friends here think that my favorite movies are too slow or that the music i like is really vintage. actually, i think their responses are both cute and fair, but it means you can never have a serious conversation or a dissection of that work because they don't share an interest in that same discourse. however, we do share an interest in the discourse of community forestry but we use a different ways of thinking and mine is not necessarily equally valued because it does not address the problem or issues in a way that is effective in their field or even their language. that leaves me sometimes feeling insecure about what i have to offer and i also end up asking myself whether i can make my work more effective in a language that is closer to theirs.

more importantly, rather than adjusting my language to theirs, i am also asking myself, what do i need to do to make this project great? if i want to share the collective knowledge of community forestry expressed by the communities, and if all human knowledge is acquired from experience, how do i create a secondary or third experience for which others can understand the primary experience? the thing is that scientists and foresters are responsible for information, not necessarily responsible for making it accesible or understandable. but as an artist, i feel that my role is to create an interruption for understanding: to provide viewers with an opportunity to leaven their knowledge rather than just adding forgettable information to their lives. i may not be contributing to the expansion of community forestry or increasing a community's livelihoods, but can i help people understand these communities, some of the poorest and most reliant on natural resources, are making an empowering and powerful choice in practicing sustainable natural resource management?



a quick scan of a family taking home a seedling after the eastern provinces of thailand community forestry network fair in the district of bong tong and province of chonburi, *note: in established community forests, one of the biggest challenges these villages face is engaging their younger generations in learning about natural resource management to continue maintaing the community forest.