she knows everything

Estelle,

Of course, you can send me anything. Have fun. Just let them feel your enthusiasm and belief in what you do. That will take you far.

Love,
Laura

9 days til im BKK bound.

i think when i find one of those people in my life i will say, i'm sorry it took me so long to get to you.

Slowly, but surely i am going to finish this application.

X Letter of Affiliation
X Statement of Purpose
XXRecommendations

To do:
Portfolio
Language Evaluation
Personal Statement
1 more Recommendation

Currently, all signs point to being leader of the pack. Lots of support from CORC. Lots of support from all around. I have to finish this application. My lyfe has been this application (and helping my mom out at the kiosk).

I'm leaving so soon. Two and a half weeks. Really insane. So much to do.

night swimming frees me. i lose track of time wonderfully in warm, warm water. the sunset goes by and i don't have to deal with turning into a little brownie when i get to swim at night!

listening to my favorite miss. records mix. it makes me feel soooo sad when i don't have anything to feel sad about. sometimes you just want that different feeling than the one you always feel. the major feeling i have is a cool calm. today i felt it all day in the best ways- reading, swimming, eating cottage cheese with chips and hot sauce, working on my f. application, so now i'm deciding to change it up. i'm going to even go across the street to south bar, a horrible jock bar, to have a glass of water with megan, well, she's going to have a cocktail.

i have fully accepted that i don't like to drink.

i met a pretty fascinating lady today at work. she came in very hungry and speaking thai very fast asking, "as a thai person, what do you recommend on (yr mother's) menu? i was so nervous that i said, "MOM! there is a thai person at the window!!" turns out this lady is unusually gifted in her vast ambitions which include scuba diving, hiking, photography, education and business. especially business because she's written several number one best selling business books in thailand. what i think best sums her up are explained in the excerpts from the emails she has sent me:

"Hi there, it is great to meet you. see you in August. Let's go to do many activities. I really like your photos but to be honest, you gotta do more. I feel like you can do more and better. I want you to do more. you know why. You are American born Thai. You can use imagination to hep Thailand rescue something. Do whatever you want but your imagination can help Thailand. Trust me on this. We gotta do more photos when you are in Thailand."

strange maternal aura. frank yet supportive. what i need? definitely refreshing and i'm looking forward to this kind of fervent female support in thailand.

bought my ticket to bangkok yesterday. i leave august 5. very insane, and i'm so glad my brother and mother can come for a month. bali bali bali bali. we need to get tickets there. trying to convince her that 4 days is not enough and it needs to be more like 10 days.

been laying around home like crazy, but my ankle is getting better so i won't have to do this for that much longer. had a great girl hang with amanda and lauren. you know like, white wine and ice cream. it was awesome. and relationship talks. awesome.

too many people to catch up with LA. i only really feel like hanging with a few. what to do?

emmet gowin

“It might take us a lifetime to find out what it is we need to say. Most of us fall into where our feelings are headed while we’re quite young. But the beauty of all this uncertainty would be that in the process of exhausting all the possibilities, we might actually stumble unconsciously into the recognition of something that’s useful to us, that speaks to a deep need within ourselves. At the same time, I like to think that in order for any of us to really do anything new, we can’t know exactly what it is we are doing.
So we can’t possibly know what it is we really need. At least, from the view point of originality, we can’t. And still there can be a good sense to what all our drives and needs are expressing.”

from this interview

laying home all day, with exception to having israeli and yemeni brunch delights at eliana's house, with a baseball sized ankle. a few good things have come out of this though, which is discovering:

-two new institutions who offer travel grants for humanitarian work
-a new photographer that i love by the name of ann wadden, particularly her work in china.

i believe she uses large format, which makes me want to fix my large camera before i leave. i should certainly try.

i am continuing to redraft my ideas and itinerary to develop a more effective participation. it will happen!

Despite an amazing trip out east, it feels great to wake up in LA. Gray morning spent with my new electric tea pot watching internet tv and eating sticky rice with mangoes for breakfast. My greenhouse is looking good thanks to mom. I woke up to more budding orchids. Now it's a bike ride around town for a good film processing establishment to reveal photographs from my trip, help mom out at the store, eat with pops, and then an evening swim. Now that I am back, I'll be doing serious planning for my yearlong trip in Thailand- kind of frightening, but what I've been waiting all year for.

I can't believe the last two weeks. I was so lucky to experience all that I did from visiting great friends, eating fresh fish to seeing so much of more of new england and meeting so many gracious and hospitable folks. How am I so lucky to know such lovely people? So very happy!

Also there is a seed planted for another New England project. I think it will be two or so years before it happens, but I'm already brain storming.